


It's HIM

by elizaberglund



Category: Football - Fandom, soccer RPS
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-24
Updated: 2014-08-24
Packaged: 2018-02-14 12:08:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2191284
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/elizaberglund/pseuds/elizaberglund
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Just a story about men bastian loved</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's HIM

**Author's Note:**

> lies lies lies and product of my imagination, not for profit, don't sue,

Bastian felt a small kiss being placed on his lips before the older man slipped from the bed. He kept his eyes shut, pretending to be still asleep. He opened them only when he heard the bathroom door click shut. It was all so confusing.

He fisted the white sheets under his fingers as he looked around the spacious bedroom. Bastian’s own bedroom, just like his whole apartment, was full of expensive things. Pep’s was elegant, stylish and clearly expensive.

But while his own home said "I can afford it,” Pep’s home said "I have class.”

And if he was honest, he didn't know many men like that. He also very honestly never went to bed with them... He also haven't gone to bed with a man for so many years ... why now? Why him?

 

Clumsy kisses with too much tongue, way to much teeth. Eager hands that were roaming all over their teenage bodies. Impatient cocks that just couldn't stop leaking, ruining their boxers. When Bastian realized that Felix was also that way and that he was willing ... with Bastian ... He couldn't believe his luck. The brown haired skier was his best friend for years ... They got into so much mischief together in the ski camps ... They were the terrible couple ... and they had a blast. Felix was simply fantastic. He was also such a beautiful boy, and Bastian ... Bastian with his lion-like facial features, small eyes and worst case of acne he have ever seen ... He felt ugly ... "Seriously man, you better become rich and famous." used to say his very nice friends. But Felix didn't, ever. They didn't see each other all that often, with one of them always on the ski slopes and the other perfecting his skills in Munich. But when they did ... it was all tongues, lips, mouths, hands and cocks. And one day ...

 

"Will you let me?" asked Felix and toughed Bastian’s hole with his fingers. The blond’s eyes grew huge and his heart started pounding stronger.

 

"Please... I just want to finally become a man." pleaded Felix. Bastian looked at his confused for a moment. A man? If Felix fucked him he would become a man? So what would that make Bastian? ... But then he understood. Having sex, crossing the line between a boy and a man. Becoming an adult.

 

"Only if you let me too."

 

He didn't like it. It hurt too much and he was too scared to even think about enjoying it. And it was over too fast ... Felix didn't like it when Bastian fucked him either.

 

"We are probably not gay after all." reasoned Felix. "We didn't like gay sex. Can gay guys not like gay sex? We are friends and we like each other ... and we are sixteen so we are always horny so we did stuff but ... I'm sure we are not gay."

 

Bastian was not so sure. They didn't like it but they were probably doing something wrong. He was about to tell that to Felix when he saw the silent plea in the dark haired boys eyes. Fear and hope and plea ... Bastian could only nod.

 

He came back to Munich. Back to football academy and his mates. All oh so straight mates, or only pretending to be straight … but pretending so hard that Bastian wouldn’t dare to even suggest anything else. He concentrated on football and dated girls. He found out that he liked girls too. So maybe Felix wasn’t totally wrong. Bastian was gay but … half-gay really, people like him were called bisexual. He liked boys and girls and football and … And he was getting famous just like they advised him to … not because they advised him, those assholes, but because he was simply that good. The papers loved to write about a young, talented Bavarian kid that showed so much potential in the reserves team. Ottmar Hitzfeld clearly loved him too because he gave him his debut just after a few training sessions with the first team.

 

Someone else loved him too. Oliver Khan. Big and scary Oliver Khan. Captain of the team. Someone to respect and fear. Because as cocky and confident Bastian was, he was not stupid. And one would have to be stupid not to fear Oliver Khan at least a little. The older man had short temper and no-nonsense attitude. One simply didn’t want to get on his bad side.

Yet … Oli could be surprising gentle and loving when he wanted and Bastian soon discovered that yes indeed, he and Felix did everything wrong. Maybe they weren’t really men yet. They were boys that had no idea what they were doing and Oli … Oli knew very well. And soon Bastian knew too. The captain took everything, took it all and gave it back thousand times more. And the young man … he felt he could himself this now … Bastian knew by now that he was gay … half-gay, bisexual … but there was a part of him that very much gay and he learned to love this part. And …

 

And then Liza came back from his short spell with Olympique Marseille and it proved to be the wildest year in Bastian’s life. Sexual life that is. The French Basque was a force of nature. He was not edgy and intense like Oli but he too found a way to completely take over the younger man’s life. And he seemed to know even more than the captain. Bastian was even now blushing sometimes when he thought about some of the things they did.

And then … Liza retired and moved away from Munich. The younger man shouted at him, cried and plead. He knew deep down that he was being unfair. Footballers career was a short one and Liza was already thirty seven. He knew that yet it didn’t make him feel better.

 

“Cheri, “ started Liza as he held Bastian’s face in his hands. “Stop it. You don’t need me. You are a beautiful boy and you will soon have many suitors.”

 

Bastian only shook his head, tears appearing in his eyes.

 

“What did you think we were having there?” asked the Basque as he traced his lover’s lower lip with his finger.

 

“I …” started Bastian.

 

“Shhhhhhhh … Don’t say that” Liza silenced him with his finger. “You don’t … Trust me, you really don’t.”

 

Oli didn’t say anything. He didn’t comment. He didn’t shout. He didn’t say a word. He also never touched Bastian again. He was just looking at him with those intense cold blue eyes. The younger man couldn’t read him at all.

 

And that was it. There were no more men in Bastian’s life. Everybody, fans, media … even some of his team mates thought he was with Lukas. But no. Schweinski was really just a beautiful … crazy, silly, goofy and ridiculous but still very beautiful friendship.

He was single for a few months and then … he saw this beautiful girl … So beautiful that she did not seem to belong to this world. Beautiful, elegant, fashionable, worldly … everything he was not. Yet, she seemed to find something in him too because she did not cast him off. She agreed on a few dates, she saw him play. She let him wait for her on a bench in front of the building she worked in … He later bought this bench and it was still in their apartment. Sarah made him see a new perspectives, meet new people, different lifestyles, different views… Bastian felt like his world was expanding … He told Lukas once: “I was a boy from Bavarian village and she took me to Paris.” Literally and figuratively. He loved her like mad.

 

 

What on Earth was he doing then? He had Sarah. He loved Sarah. What was he doing with Pep? He found the older man absolutely intoxicating. Brilliant sharp football mind, caring personality, intelligence … He was an extraordinary man. He had perfect manners … most of the time … if his emotions did not take over. He was … just so intense. In a good way, like Oli and Liza … even if in totally different way. Just like them, he took Bastian in completely new places. With his mind, body and soul. He owned him, consumed him and it terrified him, yet … it made him whole. That he needed Pep so much. That he loved him so much. That he couldn’t and didn’t want to give him up. He … he loved Sarah. What on Earth was he doing?

“Maybe that’s him.” Said Sarah later that day when they both came back home. They were sitting on the sofa in their living room. He looked at her surprised.

 

“Who?” asked Bastian weakly.

 

“Pep.” She said looking him straight in the eyes. The player felt like his heart was about to stop. She knew. How did she knew? Silly Bastian! She was a model. She worked in fashion industry. She knew more about gay and bisexual men than he did. And he did told her about his former lovers. He didn’t want to keep secrets from her. She probably figured him out. He knew that she could read him like an open book for her.

 

“Maybe, it’s HIM. The one.” She suggested with a little smile and stroked his chest, right at his trembling heart. She knew. She understood … even when he didn’t. She knew, she understood and approved.

 

“I love you.”

 

“I know.”


End file.
